shakey

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter." -MLK

the big game

"Don't ask for guarantees. And don't look to be saved by any one thing, person, machine, or library. Do your own bit of saving, and if you drown, at least die knowing you were heading for shore."

-ray bradbury

closing circle

"sometimes, people are just interested in other people."

someday, I'll answer all your questions.

...if you still want my answers, that is.

"just saying'"

venomous

Its a hole deep inside of me, and it grows. I can feel it eat away at each good thing; it tells me that it doesn't mean anything, or that it isn't real. It tells me that each little thing that makes me happy comes from bad intentions. And then the further I distance myself from the things that I love, the more space I make in my heart for it. Its a knot in my throat, its anger, its the feeling that my heart is surrounded by a spiked fence. Its the knowledge that I'm not only not letting people in, I'm pushing people away. And then I focus on it, and the fact that I'm letting it win only drives the despair further.

It won't win.

I love this life, and I love everything I'm doing. There is nothing to make me sad, and the luck that life has handed me only deserves to be repaid with a smile. This is to remind me...to help me remember that I have been handed so much passion and excitement, and wasting my energy on an indescribable sadness is simply disrespectful to the world and to myself. Its time for the tears to go. It's time to open my eyes and recognize that I have solutions, and that I can fix this.